Rad Geek People's Daily

The bad news is that John Ashcroft is delusional. And I mean absolutely fucking bonkers:

The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved, Mr. Ashcroft wrote in a five-page, handwritten letter to Mr. Bush, The A.P. said.

The good news, though, is that whatever he happens to believe, he is no longer the Attorney General of the United States:

Yet I believe that the Department of Justice would be well served by new leadership and fresh inspiration, Mr. Ashcroft said. I believe that my energies and talents should be directed toward other challenging horizons.

The departure of Mr. Ashcroft was not a big surprise since the attorney general, who is 62, had a severe gallstone ailment earlier this year and has had a sometimes bumpy relationship with the White House.

— New York Times 2004/11/09: Attorney General and Commerce Secretary Resign from Cabinet

After four years, no more of the Crisco Messiah‘s efforts to secure our safety and liberties from those who hate freedom. No more Ashcroft subpoenas on the private medical records of women’s abortions, and no more rousing refrains of Let the Eagle Soar. Of course, you have to worry that his replacement could always be worse; but it’s hard to imagine how, exactly, and so far, most of the possibilities that have been floated–Alberto Gonzalez, Rudy Giuliani, Larry Thompson–are, for all their faults, far more moderate, better on civil liberties, and far less representative of the Death Cult wing of the Republican machine. So here’s a toast to old Johnny A–it’s been fun, we won’t miss you at all, and God speed you–straight out of Washington!