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Minor Consolations

Here's a pretty old legacy post from the blog archives of Geekery Today; it was written about 20 years ago, in 2004, on the World Wide Web.

The bad news is that John Ashcroft is delusional. And I mean absolutely fucking bonkers:

The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved, Mr. Ashcroft wrote in a five-page, handwritten letter to Mr. Bush, The A.P. said.

The good news, though, is that whatever he happens to believe, he is no longer the Attorney General of the United States:

Yet I believe that the Department of Justice would be well served by new leadership and fresh inspiration, Mr. Ashcroft said. I believe that my energies and talents should be directed toward other challenging horizons.

The departure of Mr. Ashcroft was not a big surprise since the attorney general, who is 62, had a severe gallstone ailment earlier this year and has had a sometimes bumpy relationship with the White House.

— New York Times 2004/11/09: Attorney General and Commerce Secretary Resign from Cabinet

After four years, no more of the Crisco Messiah‘s efforts to secure our safety and liberties from those who hate freedom. No more Ashcroft subpoenas on the private medical records of women’s abortions, and no more rousing refrains of Let the Eagle Soar. Of course, you have to worry that his replacement could always be worse; but it’s hard to imagine how, exactly, and so far, most of the possibilities that have been floated–Alberto Gonzalez, Rudy Giuliani, Larry Thompson–are, for all their faults, far more moderate, better on civil liberties, and far less representative of the Death Cult wing of the Republican machine. So here’s a toast to old Johnny A–it’s been fun, we won’t miss you at all, and God speed you–straight out of Washington!

2 replies to Minor Consolations Use a feed to Follow replies to this article

  1. Sameul Haque

    The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.

    You have to remember that the letter was written to Bush who no longer has firm a grip on reality himself and is arguably insane. It is unclear whether Ashcroft actueally meant any of his parting words to Bush. In related news, commerce secretary and Tommy Franks won’t even take a job in the Bush administration.

  2. Sergio M�ndez

    You are a bit optimistic Charles. Wait to see what other nutcase Bush selects to replace Ashcroft….

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